Maintaining a positive mind-set

“The trouble is...”

How to maintain a positive mind - set in a negative environment

“Think of something that you have done well recently in your work”.

As part of a learning set I facilitate for Health & Social Care practitioners, this first introductory question is designed to be straightforward.  It’s astonishing how few people are able to talk easily about what they have done well, whether as an individual or as part of a team.  Part of this is the struggle to quickly bring to mind something that is tangible and relevant.  Yet on closer listening to their conversations, each group drifts towards general chat about problems, difficulties and other negative stuff.

When I raise this with the wider group, I hear the same thing time and again.  “It’s not that we don’t want to talk about what we do well, it’s more that we’re not used to it, so it doesn’t come easily.”  They then acknowledge that what does come easily, is talking about difficulties because they’re more practised at that.  There is nothing wrong with this, but it’s important to notice –for example the habit of gravitating quickly to the negatives in meetings, in supervision, or in conversations about clients, customers or partnerships.  This can often result in everyone getting sucked into the vortex of negativity and circular conversations or leaping for a quick fix to the problem.  A strengths-based approach to problem solving helps us be more creative – it builds trust, helps us ask powerful questions and thereby spot the patterns of current behaviour, and how this might be resolved differently and for the long term.

The next exercise I set the group is to let them hear a seemingly negative monologue or stream of consciousness.  I then ask them to ‘pan for gold’.  This is a simple metaphor that involves listening out for any positives in what otherwise would seem totally negative.  For example, in a workplace setting, I often hear the following:

Lucy:

“Frankly, my [supervision] sessions are a waste of time.  It’s just a chance for the manager to tell me what needs to get done.  I want to be listened to, not talked at, but what can I do?  Two of my colleagues find reasons to put them off, they’re that bad.”

At one level, the individual is just having a moan.  But by recognising the positives that have been said, we can completely reframe the conversation so that they can begin to see the situation in a slightly different light, and then explore possibilities.  The positives are:

  1. Lucy knows what the problem is
  2. She knows what she wants
  3. She is making a choice to be there where others are doing the opposite
  4. She asks a fabulous and important question

This is not to suggest that I will always leap to the positives, but I have trained myself to notice them in passing, which in itself gives more options about where to begin.

Noticing the positives is the first step towards positive reframing.  It is a habit that can be learned anytime and anywhere, but becomes particularly helpful in a negative environment.  It also makes giving feedback easier because good feedback is always constructive, never destructive.  We try to ensure an individual receiving the feedback leaves the conversation at least feeling okay about themselves, and hopefully good about themselves and optimistic.  While we cannot take responsibility for how someone will receive what we say, we can ensure that by adopting a positive, strengths-based approach we can say the things that need to be said in ways that they don’t feel diminished.

If you don’t do so already, try finishing/ starting the week with a note in your learning diary or just to yourself/colleague about something you’re really pleased with what you’ve accomplished at the weekend or during the week.  It becomes a good habit, and we can then receive compliments more easily without brushing them off.   So, if anyone asks you what you’ve done well recently, you can respond swiftly, fluently and concisely.  This builds confidence in yourself and others and sets the tone for the conversation.

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Fantastic course [Motivational Interviewing]! Totally relevant, understandable, practical and interesting. I look forward to using the skills and tools I learned. I was particularly impressed with Alasdair Cant. He is a brilliant trainer, knowledgeable, patient, engaging and clearly skilled at facilitating groups ensuring fun and learning.

Youth Justice Worker

I thought the course was very powerful and has given me tools to approach my job positively!

Social Worker

Excellent course, I liked the visual examples, it helps to reinforce learning. Great trainer and very attentive to pace and understanding of the group

Participant

Excellent course [Motivational Interviewing]. I recommend it to all staff working within the Youth Offending Service.

Youth Justice Worker

The course content and delivery were excellent. The learning outcomes I achieved were highly relevant to my field of work. I highly recommend this training to all professionals that work with clients.

Youth Justice Manager, London

This was a stimulating and inspiring course for me. I found that it reminded me of some of the core areas and pleasures of my therapeutic working.

Occupational Therapist

I thought the course was very powerful and has given me tools to approach my job positively!

Social Worker

Alasdair is one of the best trainers I've experienced - very knowledgeable, calm and interesting. A wonderful and rewarding experience.

Social Worker

I thought the course was very powerful and has given me tools to approach my job positively!

Social Worker

Alasdair was extremely patient, a good listener, and helped to prise my feelings out of me even when I didn’t necessarily understand them myself!

Arts Manager (Coaching)

Participative and vibrant discussion whilst adhering to a learning framework. Good time boundaries. Good role play. Learned a lot.

Child Protection Worker

Nicely paced, appropriately interactive, very facilitative, fine to ask questions. Actually enjoyable!

Probation Officer, Essex

This training course [Training the Trainer] has been the best one I've attended. Alasdair was very competent in delivering all we needed to know. The course was inspirational, not just an ordinary training course. I had a lot of fun and I would strongly recommend this course for anyone who needs to deliver training within their work.

Equality & Diversity Officer, Westminster PCT

We could not have asked for a better trainer or training programme. Alasdair is open, engaging and encouraging. The days flew by. I have learned an incredible amount without feeling overloaded.

Early Support Development Co-ordinator, London

This training [Motivational Interviewing] should be compulsory for all staff, but only if delivered at this high standard.

Mental Health Team leader

Excellent course, very relevant to my role as an ISS YOT specialist. Very good role play and theoretical content. Good overview of a complicated style of working with young people, but looks so easy when done well.

Youth Justice Manager, London

Each day of the course brought new experiences and new learning. It was extremely interactive, thought provoking and valuable. I will thoroughly recommend this course [Training the Trainer] to my colleagues. The facilitator was excellent. Thank you!

Training & Learning Development Co-ordinator, London

This has been a useful refresher course for me as I have been reminded about the key principles behind Motivational Interviewing that I had neglected to use

Participant

The quality of the facilitation was excellent and helped us explore potentially emotive topics in a very professional manner.

Team Manager, Westminster

The training was delivered in a clear and respectful manner. Alasdair made the course engaging and interesting for the participants.

Senior Arts Manager

Very positive training with a knowledgeable and skillful trainer. The group engagement was very positive and a lot of leaning took place between the group.

Participant

Thank you for coming today and providing such a good foundation for our staff. I could see they were very engaged all day and that is exactly what I hoped for. The information was pitched at the right level and I hope you are pleased with feedback.

Commissioner, Clinical Lead Mental Health, London PCT

Fantastic course [Motivational Interviewing]! Totally relevant, understandable, practical and interesting. I look forward to using the skills and tools I learned. I was particularly impressed with Alasdair Cant. He is a brilliant trainer, knowledgeable, patient, engaging and clearly skilled at facilitating groups ensuring fun and learning.

Youth Justice Worker

Rare delivery style and facilitation by Alasdair. Excellent - very relaxed, informal, detailed and knowledgeable, but easily digestible and pitched at the right level.

Probation Officer, Hertfordshire

This training course [Training the Trainer] has been the best one I've attended. Alasdair was very competent in delivering all we needed to know. The course was inspirational, not just an ordinary training course. I had a lot of fun and I would strongly recommend this course for anyone who needs to deliver training within their work.

Equality & Diversity Officer, Westminster PCT

It has been so valuable to have the space for the team to come together and talk about aspects of their work in a supportive environment

Senior Arts Manager

Brilliant day - glad I came...very stimulating and beneficial.

Voluntary Sector Project Manager

Enjoyable and productive. I found your facilitation was calm and relaxed but also purposeful which drew good contributions from the team. Thank you.

Participant

Nice to get a chance to hash out things with the team in a ‘safe’ environment

Senior Arts Manager

An enjoyable day, open, engaging and tangible outcomes. I was able to participate but listened to colleagues with I hope an open mind and will consider views on reflection. Tangible outcomes for us to take forward and I have a clarity of where we need to go next. I am inspired but empowered to question! Thanks Alasdair.

Participant